This week’s historical dumpster fire
They Put a Dead Pope on Trial
A keepsake from hell: The Cadaver Synod.
A weekly dose of macabre history, gently pressed into your hands like a haunted educational pamphlet.
In the year 897 (nope, didn’t forget a one there…), Pope Stephen VI decided he had unfinished business with his predecessor, Pope Formosus.
There was one small administrative problem.
Formosus had been dead for months.
Stephen’s solution was not to simply let this go like a normal person. Hell no.
He had the corpse dug up.
Formosus was dressed back in his papal robes, seated upright on a throne, and formally put on trial before a church council.
A deacon was even assigned to stand beside the corpse and answer questions on his behalf.
Which seems unfair.
Your attorney really should consult you before entering a plea.
The charges: he’d supposedly become pope the wrong way, since he was technically still the bishop of somewhere else at the time. Plus a stack of old political grudges, dug back up for the occasion.
Basically the medieval church pointing a finger and going, “That’s no fairrr!!”
Shockingly, the defense did not go well.
Formosus was found guilty.
His papal acts were declared invalid, his robes were stripped from the body, and the three fingers he had used to give blessings were cut from his right hand.
His corpse was then buried in a common grave.
And apparently everyone looked at this situation and thought:
Still not enough.
The body was dug up again and thrown into the Tiber River.
Eventually Formosus was recovered, reburied with honors, and the judgment against him was overturned.
Pope Stephen VI, meanwhile, was imprisoned and strangled to death later that same year.
So if there is a lesson here, it may simply be:
Sometimes you should leave the dead alone.
Seance scent pairing
This one belongs to The Undertaking — for those who prefer their dealings with the dead to involve considerably less litigation. The Undertaking is dark, solemn, and much easier than exhuming someone because you still have a few things you’d like to discuss.
Please note: no AI. That is right, this came from the dark folds of Lacey’s very human mind.
www.seanceperfumes.com · @seanceperfumes
